[HARRISONBURG, Va. (March 12) -- For five months, Virginia carpenter Steve Williams lived with a secret worth millions. Williams won a $200 million Mega Millions lottery jackpot on Oct. 16 but only came forward Friday after consulting with legal and financial advisers. Williams, from Shenandoah in northern Virginia, says he is going to invest the money. Williams chose the cash option of $125 million, rather than receive the full amount over 26 years. After taxes, Williams gets about $88.9 million.]

Hum, a reason to play Mega Lotto, and not to worry over picking out numbers! What would this kind of money do for me? Well, the drama would change things a bit, I guess. Except for knowing that I could buy any produce at the market no matter if it was 3.99/pound or 1.99/pound would be a benefit for sure. And then paying the bills the day after they hit my mail box would be a good thing ... (I remember those days well and miss them, really miss them) ... the only thoughts I have about the subject: The good it could do for others; my kids; my community & my church. I think one can have too much money and when one does it can change them. I think even Bill Gates was changed by his money even if he gives a great deal of it away. I think money is a good thing when and only when it is used for good purposes. I remind myself every day how blessed I am in other areas but to be honest I'd kind of like to have enough to pay the bills on time and buy that perfect bunch of asparagus when it is 3.99/pound.

I am feeling blue today. I miss Win. I miss what happens to me when he calls or sends a couple of lines over the Internet. I simply miss him and I am sad he is not in communications with me. I am such an idiot! Idiot! Finally found someone who lights up my world with the single word, hello and who fills my heart with joy ... just thinking about him makes me smile and I wish I was smiling more these days.

The weather is coolish but pleasant outside. The rain has stopped and I can hear birds chirping outside my window. There are a lot of birds around here. I love that about living here. I love birds. I think I should get myself one! I wonder if the 300.00 animal deposit apply to a bird? Of course, if I had 300.00 to spare I would have a dog. I miss Lacy so much. She was a real true companion. When I go out to walk it is not the same without Lacy.

Well, Mama, if you're listening in on this think you could help heal my heart? Love you Mama. Keep the clouds warm for me I'll be there someday with you and we'll fix the world! :) together.